The term ‘spiritual bypass’ was coined in 1984 by the American psychologist John Welwood to describe the use of spiritual beliefs or practises to avoid dealing with painful feelings, unresolved wounds and unmet basic psychological needs. Our society values individualism and personal growth and supports the exploration of unique spiritual paths that deviate from established orthodox standards and yet contribute to authentic personal empowerment.
Personal spiritual practises can help us to think outside the box and ultimately provide a sense of freedom and authenticity in one’s spiritual existence. But turning to meditation, yoga, ritual, journaling, or any other form of spiritual practise as a form of superficial growth neglects real development and ultimately hides or represses even more the aspects of ourselves that most need to be changed and resolved.
When we are spiritually bypassing, we avoid personal problems by using spirituality to escape emotional pain or difficult situations. Or when we over-emphasise positive thinking and ignore negative emotions or experiences, we begin to detach from reality and disconnect from the problems and responsibilities, such as someone who meditates to escape their anger instead of dealing with the cause of their anger, or someone who uses affirmations to ignore feelings of sadness or grief.
Spiritual practises such as meditation or affirmations can be incredibly powerful opportunities for real personal growth, but we must be careful not to use our spiritual practises to hide from what we need to bring to light.
In our personal spiritual practise, the ego is quick to try to take control, using the appearance of spiritual development to boost its self-esteem or to avoid being confronted with personal flaws. We can recognise that the ego has begun to take control when someone begins to proclaim that they are more ‘enlightened’ than others, when they use spirituality to justify or ignore their own negative behaviour, or when they use spiritual practises to avoid life’s challenges.
Recognising when this is the case for us is especially important for creatives because spiritual avoidance can actually hinder your creative and personal growth because avoiding emotional depth and intensity can limit our creative expression and authenticity.
On our spiritual path, we must continue to cultivate self-knowledge and discernment. We gain self-knowledge not only through our usual spiritual practises such as meditation, journaling or ritual, but also by seeking feedback from trusted peers and taking perspectives from others who can point out our avoidance patterns, such as therapists or counsellors. In this way, we can allow vulnerability and authenticity by allowing ourselves to experience and express all emotions rather than using spirituality to avoid them.
Likewise, discernment plays a crucial role in distinguishing between genuine spiritual growth and avoidance behaviours disguised as spiritual practises. This involves a deep, introspective examination of one’s own motivations and the ability to recognise when spirituality is being used to avoid unresolved emotional issues.
Discernment requires honesty and self-awareness and allows individuals to see through the facade of spiritual superiority or forced positivity that often accompanies spiritual evasion. By cultivating discernment, one can navigate the spiritual path with integrity and ensure that spiritual practises are integrated into personal development rather than serving as an escape from it. This balanced approach fosters authentic growth and helps individuals address underlying psychological and emotional wounds, leading to a more holistic and grounded spirituality.
To avoid spiritual bypassing, the first crucial step is cultivating self-awareness and honesty. This includes regularly reflecting on your spiritual practises and motivations. Do you utilise meditation, yoga or ritual to truly connect with your inner self, or do you use these practises to escape unpleasant feelings and situations? Journaling can help you document your thoughts, feelings, and spiritual experiences.
By honestly addressing your emotional state and recognising any tendency to avoid pain, you can begin to connect your spiritual practises to your personal growth. Mindfulness meditation, which focuses on attention to the present moment and non-judgmental observation of thoughts and feelings, can also help you stay grounded and avoid the avoidance behaviours typical of spiritual bypassing.
Another effective strategy to avoid spiritual bypassing is to seek support from professionals and peers. Therapists and counsellors who are trained in integrating spirituality and psychology can provide you with valuable insights and tools to address unresolved emotional issues. They can help you recognise patterns of avoidance and work through underlying emotional wounds.
It is also beneficial to discuss your spiritual path with trusted teachers and guides who can give you honest feedback. Sometimes others can recognise our avoidance patterns more clearly than we can ourselves. Participating in group discussions or spiritual communities where members value personal growth alongside spiritual development can create a supportive environment that encourages authenticity and vulnerability.
Finally, it is important to maintain a balance between spiritual practises and real-life commitments to avoid spiritual bypassing. It is important to remember that spirituality should enhance your ability to engage with the world, not serve to escape from it. Grounding practises such as physical exercise, spending time in nature, or engaging in community service can help you stay connected to reality.
Check in regularly to see if your spiritual activities are improving your ability to deal with life’s challenges or if they are becoming a way to avoid them. By ensuring that your spiritual practises are integrated into your daily life and responsibilities, you create a holistic approach that promotes true personal and spiritual growth. This balance not only prevents spiritual bypassing, but also enriches your overall well-being and creativity.
Spiritual bypassing is a very common problem that hinders spiritual and personal growth as well as creative development. And recognising and addressing the spiritual bypass is crucial for creative people embarking on the path of authentic spiritual and personal growth, while overcoming the challenges that come with it. True spiritual and creative growth involves addressing and healing our soul wounds, utilising grounding practises such as exercise or walks in nature, and taking a holistic approach to our spirituality and creativity that allows input from experienced spiritual teachers.
