Mindfulness and Meditation: Embracing Thoughts Without Being Controlled by Them

Through meditation we can develop a different relationship with our thoughts, a more mindful approach that allows us to observe them without being controlled by them. By meditating regularly, we can cultivate a sense of inner peace and self-knowledge and gain the ability to recognise our thoughts and feelings without being overwhelmed by them. This process enables us to face life’s challenges with greater clarity and purpose, improving our overall wellbeing and mental resilience. As we continue to deepen our meditation practise, we may find that our capacity for empathy, compassion and understanding expands, leading to more harmonious relationships with others and a deep sense of connection with the world around us.

With any meditation practise, there is a natural evolution of motivation. This initial enthusiasm can change over time, which is natural in any meditation practise. In the beginning, everything feels exciting and positive, but you may experience phases where interest, concentration or motivation wane. Overcoming these phases can lead to renewed interest. It is important that you recognise that fluctuations in motivation are part of the journey and that they provide opportunities for self-reflection and growth. Accepting the ebbs and flows of motivation can deepen your understanding of the practise and lead to a more sustainable and fulfilling meditation experience. In addition, the support of a community or teacher during times of waning motivation can provide valuable insight and encouragement, helping individuals to manage and overcome these inevitable periods of fluctuation.

And I’m certainly not perfect; my own meditation practise has its ups and downs. There are times when I feel unhappy, stressed or anxious when I skip a few days. It’s not about shaming ourselves, but gently returning to our practise without judgement. And then when I look into my body and realise something is wrong, I know it’s probably because I haven’t meditated for several days, and that’s okay. It’s important to acknowledge the fluctuations in our practise and treat ourselves with kindness during these times. By accepting imperfection, we can grow and learn from our experiences, leading to a deeper sense of compassion and understanding for ourselves and others. As we master the fluctuations of our meditation journey, we develop resilience and a greater capacity for self-awareness, leading to a more meaningful and fulfilling practise.

It’s just a matter of noticing when you have drifted away from the practise for a while, perhaps due to a busy schedule or unexpected life demands, and allowing yourself to gently and non-judgementally return to the meditation practise. It’s natural for our attention to wander, but the key is to recognise this without berating ourselves. Instead, we can use these moments as an opportunity to practise the art of returning to the present moment and reconnect with the essence of meditation. With each return, we strengthen our ability to be present and we cultivate a kind and compassionate relationship with our own mind.

In meditation, the process of noticing our thoughts plays a crucial role in achieving a state of mindfulness. By recognising our thoughts without judging them, we create space for introspection and self-awareness. As we apply this practise, we gradually develop the ability to intentionally direct our thoughts and gently nudge them to flow like a calm river, free from the confines of overthinking. Just as a gentle breeze carries the clouds across the sky, we learn to let our thoughts meander through our consciousness and observe them with a sense of detachment and calm. Through this mindful observation, we cultivate a deep sense of inner peace and clarity that allows us to experience the present moment with a heightened sense of awareness and serenity.

Through our meditation practise, we start to develop a deeper understanding of the nature of our thoughts and feelings. We learn to observe the fluctuating patterns of our mind without getting caught up in them. In this way, we can cultivate a sense of detachment from our thoughts and create space for a more balanced and peaceful state of being. As we continue to practise, we become more adept at simply noticing our thoughts without judging them or holding on to them, and eventually allowing them to emerge and disappear without causing us distress. This process of non-attachment allows us to experience a greater sense of clarity and inner freedom, enabling us to face life’s challenges with a calmer and more resilient attitude.

And just as our thoughts constantly flow in a stream of consciousness, so our emotions constantly flow in a stream of consciousness. This constant flow of thoughts and emotions shapes our perceptions, reactions and ultimately our reality. It is fascinating to observe how our inner world mirrors the ever-changing outer world, creating a dynamic interplay between our thoughts, emotions and the environment around us. As we move through life, this stream of consciousness reminds us that we are connected to the world. It influences our experiences and the way we interact with others.

We are constantly bombarded with stimuli, events and interactions with other people, creating a complex web of feelings, thoughts and emotions. This intricate web can often lead to behaviours that are not conducive to our wellbeing or that of those around us. However, through the practise of meditation, we gain the ability to observe how our feelings and thoughts automatically translate into behaviours. With consistent practise, we gradually develop the ability to intercept and break the negative cycle that can manifest when harmful thoughts and emotions lead to negative or limiting behaviours. This increased awareness allows for a greater sense of control and the ability to respond to stimuli in a more attentive and constructive way.

Just as people lift weights at the gym to get stronger or run on the treadmill to develop more stamina and speed, through meditation we train our mind’s ability to notice when a thought or emotion immediately and unconsciously turns into an outward behaviour, especially if that outward behaviour is not what we want to do. Through consistent practise, meditation allows us to cultivate a sense of inner calm and awareness so that we are able to respond to situations with greater clarity and purpose. It helps us to be more mindful of our thoughts and feelings by creating space between stimulus and response. This increased mindfulness can lead to healthier and more conscious responses and promote a sense of control over our actions and behaviours. In addition, meditation can also promote emotional resilience as we learn to manage challenging emotions with a sense of calmness and balance.

One of the reasons why the breath is so often used as an object of meditation is that the breath is a constant in our lives that is always available to us, whether we realise it or not. Its inherent neutrality allows it to be used as a focal point without distracting or biassing us. The rhythmic nature of the breath, its gentle rise and fall, provides a calming and grounding sensation and makes it an ideal anchor for our attention during meditation practise. The more we tune into our breath, the more we may also discover that its patterns and subtleties provide insights into our emotional and mental state, opening up a deeper level of awareness and connection with ourselves.

We notice when the mind begins to wander and then return to the present without judgement. This observation of the mind wandering and gently bringing it back to the present moment is a fundamental aspect of mindfulness meditation. It allows us to cultivate awareness and acceptance of our thoughts and feelings without getting caught up in self-criticism. The idea of non-judgement is very important here, as it creates a space for self-compassion and kindness towards ourselves. In meditation practise, every moment is an opportunity to start again, to let go of distractions and refocus our attention on the present. It is a constant process of returning, re-centring and embracing the unfolding of each moment with an open heart and mind.

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