Category: habits

How to Cultivate Gratitude Every Day

Posted on by Allan Johnson in gratitude, habits

As the nights begin to grow longer and we move into our second national lockdown in the UK there is a fair amount of uncertainty, gloom, and worry hovering about our lives.  But now more than ever is an important time to reflect on all of the things that we are grateful for. Gratitude is a practice and an attitude that we can consciously cultivate every day of our lives through a series of simple, mindful exercises: 

Start a Gratitude Journal 

Keeping track of things that that we feel grateful for can have an amazingly positive impact on our wellbeing.  If you already have a regular journaling practice, you can begin list three things that you are grateful for in each entry.  If you do not already have a regular journaling practice, begin a gratitude journal simply by starting each day by writing down three things that you are grateful for.  Spending a brief moment to reflect on what you are grateful for is a fantastic way to start the day.

Notice the Simple Pleasures 

One of the best ways cultivate more gratitude in your life is to begin to pay attention to the small things that bring you pleasure: a beautiful flower, a perfect cup of coffee, a conversation with your partner.  In those moments, take just a brief second to reflect on the pleasure that you receive from the simple things in life.  

Look for the Positive in a Negative Situation

When you find yourself in a challenging situation reflect on what positive angle you might be able to find.  The worry of having to stay at home during lockdown, for instance, may seem negative, but it could likewise be an opportunity to catch up on books you’ve been meaning to read, complete some DIY, or try to recipes that you don’t usually have time for. 

One-Day No Complaints Challenge

For just one day, set a challenge to yourself to not complain.  This includes both complaints that you say aloud to others as well as complaints that are only in your head.  The one-day no complaints challenge can seem difficult at first, but has the amazing ability to shift your perceptions very quickly.  When you find yourself about to complain about something, pause long enough to reflect on how you might transform that complaint into a positive action. 

Give an Authentic Compliment

In our society we are often bad at both giving and receiving compliments, and we often worry about how others will receive the compliments that we give to them.  However, giving authentic, genuine compliments to those around you is not only a powerful way to acknowledge what you are grateful for but helps to make the world a happier and kinder place.  

Building the Meditation Habit

Posted on by Allan Johnson in habits, meditation

While the techniques of meditation are easy to learn, the discipline that the practice of meditation requires can be difficult.  If you are new to meditation or a frequent practitioner who hasn’t been able to turn meditation into a regular practice, building the meditation habit is a crucial step to deepen and expand your insight and connection.  Even when it is difficult to find the time for meditation, remind yourself that you deserve this time to replenish, recharge, and reinvigorate your mind, body, and spirit—it’s this daily practice of self-care that will equip you to best tackle the challenges of life and work. 

To gain the full benefits of meditation, we must develop the discipline that allows us to practice daily, in the same way that we shower and brush our teeth daily without much thought.  A daily practice of mediation brings enhanced well-being, and enables to body and mind to reconnect through the breath.  On those days when you just don’t feel like meditating, remind yourself of the benefits it brings and trust the process: the stress and distress of the day disappears by the end of your meditation session, leaving you renewed.  Treasure the time you set aside for meditation for the precious gift that it is.

Here are several tips to help you build the meditation habit:

Begin with Shorter Periods

I recommend two periods of 20-minutes of meditation every day, but this is only something to build up to over time and isn’t a habit you can expect to get into straight away.  One of the biggest challenges of the discipline required by meditation is simply making the decision to meditate.  Begin by making the decision to meditate for shorter periods, perhaps 3 minutes every morning.  Over time, you can gradually build this up to more sustained sessions as you begin to recognise the benefits of meditation and the discipline of committing to it. 

Practice Daily

While it is useful to begin with shorter periods of meditation, it is still important to practice every day.  Don’t try it once and then leave it for several days or weeks before trying again.  Instead commit to daily practice, which will not only allow you to strengthen your meditation habit but will dramatically increase the positive benefits that you experience. Committing to your meditation practice daily is what is going to turn it into a habit and allow you to experience the greatest benefits.

Create a Meditation Corner

Meditation can be practiced anywhere, but, especially as a beginner, it is useful to have a specific area used for meditation.  This doesn’t have to be an elaborate meditation altar, and you certainly don’t need any fancy cushions, bells, or candles, and it doesn’t even have to be a space set aside only for meditation.  Find a simple corner in your house where you can go to each day to commit to your practice.

Keep It Simple

There are lots of fantastic tools and toys for meditators and yogis out there—I know, I’ve bought quite a lot of them.  While specialist zabutons (meditation cushion), meditation benches, signing bowls, malas, and statues can certainly help aid in your practice, they are absolutely not essential.  Don’t think that you need to wait until you have the right incense or the right prayer beads—start today, because you already have everything that you need. 

Create a Habit Trigger

While you don’t need lots of physical objects for your meditation practice, it can be helpful to have a simple candle in your meditation corner that you light at the beginning of each practice.  It doesn’t need to be expensive (a tealight or basic dinner candle will work absolutely fine).  The simple act of mindfully lighting the candle at the beginning of your daily practice helps to create a trigger for the routine and begin to prepare you for the mindful state.

Maintain a Beginner’s Mindset

In a society driven by competition and hustle, it can be easy to want to rush to the ultimate conclusion.  Sometimes we get disappointed that we aren’t transformed into a wise, ascetic monk after practicing meditation for several days, or disillusioned by what seems to be a lack of any noticeable benefits.  There is no end goal in meditation, so no need to rush or to push ourselves so hard that we feel defeated and abandon the practice.  Begin each meditation session with a beginner’s mindset, knowing that by showing up to your practice you have already made a huge achievement.

Download your free 21-day course in The Path of Mindfulness. In this life-changing 21-day mindfulness journey, Dr Allan Kilner-Johnson guides you through a series of self-guided mindfulness exercises and shows you how and when to bring mindfulness into your daily life.