mental health – Allan Johnson, PhD

Understanding Metaconsciousness for Personal Growth

Posted on December 8, 2025 by Allan Johnson in Observations

At this time of year, I always notice a subtle change in the quality of my attention. The external world doesn’t necessarily slow down, but something inwardly does. Even the light feels different. Darker, yes, but also more permeable. I’ve been feeling that contrast keenly over the last few weeks, particularly as I prepare for the turn into a new year.

It’s also been on my mind recently while reading Kate Atkinson’s Festive Spirits for my local book club’s Christmas meeting. Atkinson’s stories, playful and unsettling in equal measure, brush up against the unseen dimensions of experience without making grand metaphysical claims. They hover at the threshold. That, in its own way, is where much of my thinking about superconsciousness currently lives: not as an abstract spiritual pinnacle, but as a working edge of awareness that we keep rediscovering in different vocabularies.

In my last book and in much of my recent teaching, I’ve returned again and again to the idea that a large proportion of what we call “consciousness” is, in fact, automatic. It is hormonal, patterned, reactive, efficient. William James hinted at this more than a century ago when he described habit as the “enormous fly-wheel of society.” Freud, in his own way, mapped the vast subterranean machinery of the psyche. Contemporary neuroscience has largely confirmed what contemplative traditions have long suggested: most of what we do, think, and feel happens before we decide.

This is where the idea of metaconsciousness becomes so important, the capacity to notice that we are being moved by processes that are not, in any simple sense, “us.” It is the moment when you realise you are mid-reaction and something in you steps back just enough to witness it. Not to suppress it. Not to spiritualise it. Just to see.

But superconsciousness, as I’m increasingly working with it, points to something slightly different again. It is not merely awareness of the machinery. It is awareness that is not exclusively organised by the machinery at all. It gestures toward a dimension of mind that is less bound to survival, identity maintenance, or historical conditioning. Roberto Assagioli—whose work in psychosynthesis continues to shape my own—described the superconscious as the source of creativity, meaning, ethical insight, and transpersonal experience. Not an escape from the human, but its latent extension.

One of the things I’ve become more cautious about over the years is how easily “human potential” gets packaged as something to be maximised, extracted, or branded. The language of fulfilment can slide so quickly into performance metrics. Abraham Maslow’s later writings—often neglected in organisational culture—are far more subtle than his pyramid suggests. Self-actualisation, for Maslow, was never a static achievement, but an ongoing alignment with what is most alive and truthful in us.

Superconsciousness names a direction of travel, not a finish line.

In my own life, this shows up less in fireworks and more in micro-adjustments: choosing not to override tiredness with willpower; noticing when the body says no long before the intellect catches up; letting an idea take months instead of forcing it into productivity. It shows up in teaching too—in learning when not to fill the silence, when to let a group sit with not-knowing.

Even reading Festive Spirits this December has felt like a small act of this alignment. In between sessions, planning for the new year, and working with clients, sitting with a beautifully written short story by the fire (or, more accurately, a very convincing YouTube fire) has felt like a reminder that imagination itself is a superconscious faculty. We don’t manufacture it. We host it.

There is a tendency to associate higher states of awareness with peak experiences: mystical visions, altered states, moments of transcendence. And certainly, those exist. But what interests me far more now is how the superconscious expresses itself in the ordinary:

In ethical instincts that arise before rational justification
In sudden creative insight that reorganises months of confused thinking
In moments of compassion that interrupt long-established narratives about self and other
In the quiet certainty that a particular season of life has ended—even when nothing dramatic has occurred

This is not about becoming perfect. It is about becoming less confined.

I notice that many of the people I work with—particularly academics, creatives, and reflective professionals—are weary not because they lack insight, but because their insight has nowhere to land. They understand their patterns. They often know exactly where those patterns came from. But knowing is not the same as reorganising the centre of gravity from which one lives.

Superconsciousness, in this sense, is not an abstract spiritual add-on. It is deeply practical. It changes: how decisions are made, what counts as success, how time is experienced, where authority is located.

And perhaps most importantly, it reshapes the relationship between effort and surrender. Not everything meaningful can be solved through optimisation.

As this year draws to a close, I find myself more attuned than usual to thresholds between exhaustion and renewal, between endings and beginnings, between old strategies and new capacities for trust. This is exactly the territory that both my coaching work and my group workshops increasingly inhabit: not self-improvement as escalation, but re-orientation.

If this reflection resonates, there are a few gentle ways to continue the conversation:

🌿 1–1 Coaching

If you’re navigating a threshold of your own—professionally, creatively, or existentially—I offer integrative 1–1 coaching rooted in psychosynthesis, contemplative practice, and depth psychology.

You’re very welcome to book a free 15-minute Clarity Call here:
👉 https://allanjohnson.co.uk/coaching/

✨ Reflect & Reset: Quarterly Planning Workshop

5 January | 7.30–9.00 PM GMT | £10
A spacious, grounded evening to review the last season and consciously set the next one—without forcing premature certainty.
Register here:
👉 https://www.meetup.com/the-art-of-creative-practice/events/311948616

🧘 Integrative Meditation

12 January | 7.30–8.30 PM GMT | £4
A guided practice evening bringing together somatic awareness, imagination, and reflective presence.
Register here:
👉 https://www.meetup.com/the-art-of-creative-practice/events/311944273

Superconsciousness, for me, is no longer a speculative peak. It is a daily negotiation between who I have been conditioned to be, who I consciously try to be, and who sometimes appears unannounced in moments of clarity, creativity, or courage. It does not always feel elevated. Often it feels quiet. Sometimes inconvenient. Occasionally unmistakably right.

And perhaps that, more than anything, is the true measure of human potential: not how high we rise, but how deeply we learn to listen.

More to Explore

Reveal, Repattern, Realign: The Structure Beneath The Art of Creative Practice

Posted on December 5, 2025 by Allan Johnson in coaching, creativity

From the outside, The Art of Creative Practice can look like many different things at once. Writing programmes. Creative challenges. Emotional inquiry. Somatic awareness. Community spaces. Workshops on purpose, planning, and creating change. People arrive through different doorways, often drawn by whatever thread they most need at that moment.

But beneath that variety, the work is not fragmented. There is a single, consistent developmental movement running through all of our community events that mirrors how real change actually unfolds when it’s allowed to be both deep and sustainable:

Reveal: Understanding what’s really going on inside you
Repattern: Changing the beliefs and habits that keep you stuck
Realign: Living day-to-day in a way that matches your new clarity

They aren’t phases you complete once and leave behind. They form a cycle you return to again and again, at deeper levels, in different seasons of your life. Each time, the same essential work is happening: learning to see more truly, loosening what no longer serves, and allowing your life to reorganise around what has been clarified.

Reveal: Learning to See What Is Already Operating

Most people arrive at personal development through friction. Something isn’t working. They feel stuck, scattered, overextended, creatively blocked, emotionally fatigued. The instinct is usually to begin at the level of behaviour—to become more disciplined, more organised, more strategic. Sometimes that helps. Often it doesn’t last.

The reason is simple and quietly unsettling: much of what governs our lives is happening below the level of conscious choice.

This is why the first movement of the work is always Reveal.

This phase is about learning to see yourself accurately, beneath the surface narratives, self-concepts, and coping strategies. It’s about developing the capacity to notice:

What’s really happening in your inner world
Which part of you is leading at any given moment
What patterns are operating automatically beneath conscious choice

This is where the Three Centres of Intelligence come in:

Mind (thinking, analysing, strategising)
Emotions (feeling, relating, meaning-making)
Body (instinct, boundaries, survival, grounded presence)

Most of us don’t live from all three; we over-identify with one. And when we do, we start mistaking a single mode of intelligence for our whole identity. The overthinking mind. The emotionally over-responsible heart. The hyper-protective body.

Reveal is the slow cultivation of inner perception. It’s where we begin to notice what is actually happening inside us, not what we think should be happening.

Many people discover, with a mix of relief and disorientation, that they have been living almost entirely from one centre. The mind that never stops scanning and solving. The heart that absorbs, adapts, and over-responsibilises. The body that stays braced, alert, protective, long after the original threat has passed.

From there, we move into the language of subpersonalities or roles like the Planner, the Helper, the Protector, the Achiever, the Peacemaker, the Lone Wolf. These roles aren’t problems to be eliminated; they are survival strategies that once made deep sense. But when they run unconsciously, they run our lives.

Reveal is the phase where we stop asking “What’s wrong with me?”
And start asking, “What part of me is running the show right now?”

Reveal is not about judging these roles. It is about finally being able to see them as parts of us, rather than the totality of who we are. That shift alone often begins to release enormous pressure.

You cannot change what you cannot see. Reveal is where the seeing begins.

Repattern: When Insight Is No Longer Enough

There is a particular kind of frustration that arises once you can see your patterns clearly—but still find yourself repeating them. You understand your dynamics. You can name the role that has taken over. You can track your reflexes in real time. And yet, in the moment when it matters, the old response still arrives first.

This is where Repatterning begins.

Repatterning is not willpower layered on top of unchanged inner architecture. It is the slower, more intimate work of changing what the nervous system expects, what the emotional system anticipates, and what the psyche assumes must happen in order for you to be safe, valued, or allowed to rest.

Repatterning means working at the level of:

Beliefs
Emotional reflexes
Somatic habits
Inner rules about safety, worth, responsibility, success, and failure

Much of this work happens sideways rather than head-on. Through daily practices that reintroduce choice where compulsion once lived. Through creative process that allows the unconscious to reorganise without being forced. Through embodied attention that teaches the body it is no longer living in yesterday’s emergency. Through relational spaces where you are met differently than you were before, again and again, until something inside you begins to trust a new pattern.

In the ACP ecosystem, repatterning happens through:

Repeated daily practices
Structured reflection
Creative processing
Embodied awareness
Relational feedback inside contained group spaces

This is where the work becomes transformative rather than interpretive. Repatterning is not about becoming someone else. It’s about freeing energy that has been locked into outdated inner contracts. This phase is often uncomfortable, not because something is wrong, but because something real is changing.

Realign: Letting Your Life Catch Up With You

One of the quiet tragedies of inner work is that people often change internally while their external lives remain structurally unchanged. They become clearer, steadier, more honest with themselves—and then return to schedules, relationships, and creative arrangements that require them to abandon that clarity every day.

This is why the third movement, Realign, matters so much. Realignment is where insight and identity translate into:

What you prioritise, release, and commit to
How you structure your days
What you say yes and no to
How you work, relate, rest, and create

Realignment is where insight becomes visible in how you actually live. Not as a performance of alignment, but as a series of grounded, often difficult choices that slowly bring your outer life into correspondence with your inner truth. It shows up in how you set limits. In how you organise your working life. In how you relate to time, money, obligation, rest, ambition, and care. In what you agree to carry and what you finally allow yourself to set down.

Realignment is not a destination. It is a continual process, but over time, if it is tended to carefully, something unmistakable happens: your life begins to feel less divided against itself.

How the ACP Structure Mirrors This Arc

This rhythm of Reveal, Repattern, and Realign is quietly built into the structure of The Art of Creative Practice itself.

The weekly Integrative Meditation classes sit at the threshold between Reveal and Repattern. Week by week, they train the capacity to notice what is actually present—sensation, emotion, mental tone, inner movement—without rushing to alter it. This is Reveal in its most direct form: learning to stay with what is real. At the same time, something subtler is already beginning to shift. Through repetition, nervous system settling, and the gradual unwinding of reflexive tension, repatterning is quietly underway. New internal rhythms are being laid down beneath conscious effort.

The Challenges move more decisively into the territory of Repatterning. These are the focused immersions where insight is actively worked with rather than simply observed. Beliefs are questioned. Habits are disrupted. Roles are brought into the light and gently reorganised. The container is temporary but the changes it initiates often continue long after the formal structure ends.

And then there are the Workshops, which tend to lean most explicitly toward Realignment. This is where inner change is brought into direct conversation with the actual architecture of daily life. How you live. How you work. How you create. How you rest. How you structure your commitments and define success on your own terms. Workshops are not primarily about insight—they are about translation. About letting what has shifted internally begin to reshape the external life that must now hold it.

Seen this way, the weekly classes, the periodic challenges, and the deeper workshops are not separate offerings. They are different temporal expressions of the same developmental current. One slows perception. One reshapes pattern. One reorganises life.

People often enter The Art of Creative Practice thinking they are coming for one specific thing: writing, creativity, emotional clarity, steadiness, purpose. And they do receive that. But what they often discover, sometimes only in retrospect, is that they have also entered a larger developmental rhythm.

Each offering is not a standalone technique. It is a different expression of the same underlying movement:

Reveal what is actually present.
Repattern what has become rigid or automatic.
Realign how you live in response to what has changed.

This is why the work is cumulative. At its core, The Art of Creative Practice is not about self-improvement in the performative sense. It is about integration. About learning to live from a steadier centre of gravity. About becoming less fragmented, less driven by unconscious contracts, less at war with yourself.

This is slow work. But it is reliable. And over time, it produces something quietly radical: a life that begins to move as a single, coherent whole.

If this way of working speaks to you, the Five-Day Soul Map Challenge is the most direct and accessible way to step into it.

Across five gently structured days, you’ll be guided through the arc of Reveal, Repattern, and Realign in immediate, lived ways. You’ll begin by noticing the roles you’ve learned to inhabit, trace the deeper threads of your purpose, reflect on how struggle has shaped you, and clarify what it means to live from inner alignment rather than habit or pressure. I look forward to seeing you there!

UPCOMING EVENTS:

The Five-Day Soul Map Challenge | 8-12 December | 8-9 AM GMT | £19

Creative Flow Coworking Session | 8 December | 11AM-1PM GMT | free

Reflect & Reset: Quarterly Planning Workshop | 5 January | 7.30-9.00 PM GMT | £10

Integrative Meditation | 12 January | 7.30-8.30 PM GMT | £4

More to Explore

The Magic of December: London Streets and Seasonal Reflections

Posted on December 1, 2025 by Allan Johnson in Observations

There is something unmistakably breathtaking about walking through the streets of London in December. The winter light is low, softening the stone façades and gilded lettering that mark centuries of human endeavour. This weekend, as I wandered near St James’s Palace, I found myself pausing before a grand Georgian facade. Its windows were frosted, the door slightly chipped at the edges, but the sense of life contained within those walls—the countless stories, decisions, and quiet domestic dramas—was palpable. Heritage buildings bear witness, in a very real way, to the rhythms of ordinary and extraordinary life, much like the pages of a journal or the quiet corners of a home carefully decorated for the season.

I’ve been particularly aware of this sense of memory and rhythm in my own flat this week, as I put up my Christmas decorations. There is an energy to the season—a balance of calm and celebration—that is both external and internal. A candle flickers on the windowsill, evergreen garlands scent the air, and suddenly the small rituals of light, scent, and colour transform the everyday into something reflective, mindful, sacred in its simplicity. It is a reminder that living spaces, whether our own or the city around us, are containers for memory, intention, and presence.

Heritage buildings function in much the same way. As urban theorist and geographer Sharon Zukin notes in The Cultures of Cities, city spaces are laden with meaning precisely because they carry traces of past lives and social habits. Walking past an ornate corner of Soho or an old warehouse on the South Bank, I find myself imagining the people who once passed through these spaces: their laughter, arguments, discoveries, and defeats. In this sense, architecture is a form of storytelling, a material diary of human experience, and our attentiveness to these stories allows us to inhabit the city more fully, more consciously, and to place ourselves within a continuum that stretches far beyond our immediate perception.

This reflection on the layered life of buildings resonates with my current work in creative and contemplative practice. Preparing for my brand new Five-Day Soul Map Challenge, I’ve been thinking about the parallels between the physical memory of heritage structures and the inner architectures of our own lives. Both are built incrementally, through choices and experiences that accumulate over time. Both require attentiveness to subtle signals—of decay and renewal, of what is alive and what needs careful tending. In our inner work, this might mean noticing repeated patterns, unspoken desires, or hidden sources of energy and creativity. The Soul Map Challenge is designed to guide participants through this process of mindful inquiry, helping to chart the hidden currents shaping the present and illuminating next steps with clarity and purpose.

There is a rhythm to the city in winter, through the soft hush of early mornings, the slow drift of pedestrians along frost-lined streets, the sudden warmth of a café where conversation hums like a quiet tide. Observing the city in this way reminds me, as I do when I light my Sunwait candles (a new tradition from Sweden that I have taken up this year), that mindfulness is not just an interior exercise; it is an engagement with the textures, smells, sounds, and histories that surround us.

Later in December, I will be spending time with my family in the United States, a shift that reminds me of the duality of our experience, rooted in one place, yet carried forward by relationships and movement across space and time. Just as heritage buildings bear the memory of those who inhabited them before us, we have the influences, lessons, and love of family and community, weaving these threads into our own practice and creativity. Recognising this continuity, even amidst change, brings a surprising sense of calm and joy.

Walking through London’s historic quarters, decorating my flat, preparing for the Soul Map Challenge, and anticipating the holiday season, I have become increasingly aware of the subtle ways that structure—both literal and metaphorical—supports our inner life.

If you are curious to explore this dynamic in your own life, whether through the lens of inner alchemy, creative reflection, or structured self-inquiry, I invite you to join one of my upcoming sessions. Inner Alchemy: Practices for the New Season of You is free and takes place on 1 December, 7.30–8.30 PM GMT—a gentle, reflective hour to help you re-centre and step into winter with clarity and calm. Sign up here. For a deeper dive, the Five-Day Soul Map Challenge runs 8–12 December, 8.00–9.00 AM GMT, offering a structured week of guided inquiry to illuminate your current patterns and next right steps (£19).

This December, as I move between London and home, between daily practice and festive preparation, I am committed to noticing these layers, to honouring their subtle rhythms, and to offering space for others to do the same through my workshops and coaching. Mindful living, I find, is never abstract; it is lived in the delicate balance of attention, memory, and intention, in spaces both old and new, and in moments of quiet, flickering light that illuminate the beauty of a life well observed.

LOOKING AHEAD: AN INVITATION

If you’re in your own season of reorientation—whether creative, vocational, or relational—I’d love to support you.

Inner Alchemy: Practices for the New Season of You (FREE)
1 December, 7.30–8.30 PM GMT
A gentle, reflective hour to help you re-centre and step into winter with clarity and calm.
https://www.meetup.com/the-art-of-creative-practice/events/311901504

Five-Day Soul Map Challenge (£19)
8–12 December, 8.00–9.00 AM
A structured, powerful week of guided inquiry to help you understand the deeper patterning of your current season and identify the next right steps.

Filling the Well: Notes from Sabbatical

Posted on November 24, 2025 by Allan Johnson in academia, Observations

My research sabbatical is coming to an end, and while I have made a lot of good progress on my next book, I’ve also been delighted by the sublter transformations that I’ve encountered. Alongside the core research for my new projects— on occult print culture and the strange fidelities between intimacy and texts—I’ve been tending to what Julia Cameron calls ‘the well,’ that source of creative inspiration. I’ve been learning to slow down enough to explore new skills, curiosities, and dormant longings to surface. Some of these pursuits are practical; some are contemplative; most sit somewhere between the two.

I began to practice bookbinding because I wanted to understand, physically, how a book hangs together. Working on the history of grimoires and the materiality of printed esoterica, I kept returning to the question: what does a book know about itself? Researchers like Owen Davies point toward the intimate entanglement between form and authority; grimoires weren’t just texts but talismanic objects, their legitimacy often communicated through their very construction.

But it wasn’t until I stitched my first pamphlet binding and felt the click of thread against paper that I understood this not just intellectually but bodily. Bookbinding slows you down to a new tempo. You can’t rush glue or the slow process of folding signatures. There’s something beautifully therapeutic about it.

I’ve also been learning how to brew coffee properly, an unexpectedly transformative discipline. It started with a simple desire to make better morning coffee to get me going (how often do we think of coffee just as an efficient way to get caffeine into our bloodstream?), but quickly became an experiment in sensory calibration. James Hoffmann’s work has been a guide and inspiration here. Grind size, water temperature, bloom time: they are all micro-decisions that shape experience. Becoming more attentive to them has become vital to my routine and daily practice. Sometimes the most powerful shift comes not from a grand reinvention but from learning a new ratio, a better rhythm, a different pour.

Then there is printmaking, a new art form that I have started experimenting with more recently. Monoprints, drypoint printing, and marbling all resist control in the most generative ways. They feel like metaphors for this sabbatical as a whole: you set the conditions, choose your pigments, prepare your plate, but the final print is something all its own, often capturing what Bob Ross would call ‘happy little accidents’. Printmaking is a collaboration between matter and intention, process and surrender. Some pieces are simply meant to exist only once, a reassuring thought for someone trained to measure impact in citations, outputs, and REF cycles.

One of the surprising discoveries of sabbatical is how porous the boundaries are between ‘hobby’ and ‘research’, ‘craft’ and ‘scholarship’, ‘practice’ and ‘life’. The old binaries feel increasingly unconvincing. My work on the ethics of mail-order occultism has been deepened by physically making books. My exploration of attachment in modernist literature has been illuminated by tactile processes that centre contact, negotiation, and impression. Even the coffee—humble as it seems—has become a way of thinking about attention as a moral resource.

There is also, I suspect, something about mid-career tenderness here: the desire to re-inhabit one’s own curiosity after years of professional responsibility. Sabbatical hasn’t been a retreat from work but a reorientation toward it. The crafts have been steadying companions, teaching me to show up with less armour and more texture.

This is the energy I’m carrying into 2026, both in my writing and in the programmes I’m designing: embodied creativity, and forms of inner work that feel supportive rather than ascetic. A year of root systems rather than resolutions.

Looking Ahead: An Invitation

If you’re in your own season of reorientation—whether creative, vocational, or relational—I’d love to support you.

None of these practices—bookbinding, coffee brewing, marbling—were part of my planned sabbatical. They arrived almost incidentally, small doorways into a quieter kind of learning. But they’ve become some of the most meaningful teachers of this season. They’ve encouraged me to be a little less polished, a little more porous, and to remember that knowledge doesn’t only live in the mind.

Taming Aversion: How to Work With the Mind When It Pushes Back

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Allan Johnson in Observations

There’s a moment, familiar to anyone who has tried to live deliberately, when the mind simply says no. One minute, we’re aligned with our highest intentions, the next, we’re scrolling, tidying, grazing. That small, invisible shift — from presence to avoidance — is the terrain I’ve been exploring lately. Not because I’ve mastered it, but because I’ve been caught in it more times than I can count.

Aversion is easy to mistake for laziness, distraction, or even moral weakness. But what if it isn’t? What if the mind’s pushback isn’t defiance, but a form of care — a protective reflex triggered whenever growth begins to feel unsafe? The older I get, the more I suspect that the moments I’m most tempted to flee are the moments that matter most.

Every meaningful change seems to summon a guardian. The Buddhists call it mara; Freud might have called it resistance; psychosynthesis would describe it as a subpersonality defending its role in the inner system. Whatever name we choose, the pattern is the same: when the psyche senses transformation, it activates its most familiar defences.

Sometimes I’ll wake up with a vague heaviness, an urge to delay, to simplify the day, to shrink the horizon of possibility. The rational mind can explain it away (fatigue, overwork, weather), but underneath there’s often something more intimate: a small, frightened part that’s unsure what will happen if I really allow change to occur.

The task isn’t to override that part but to listen to it. Roberto Assagioli urges us to treat each subpersonality as purposeful, never pathological. In the same spirit, Internal Family Systems founder Richard Schwartz suggests asking these inner protectors what they’re afraid would happen if they didn’t intervene. Often the answer is touching: You might get hurt again.

There’s a strange irony in inner work: aversion tends to appear at precisely the moment when we’re closest to contact. The body stiffens not because we’re far from the truth, but because we’ve brushed against it.

This, I think, is why so many contemplative traditions treat aversion as a doorway rather than a wall. Pema Chödrön describes it as “the moment we touch our edge.” In those moments, the goal is not endurance but intimacy — learning to stay with what trembles.

When I sit in meditation and feel the urge to move, I’ve started to see it as a kind of emotional sonar. The resistance tells me something important is near. Rather than pushing through, I name it: aversion is here. I feel where it lives — perhaps in the throat, the chest, the solar plexus — and I breathe around it, widening the frame. Sometimes that’s enough. Sometimes it’s not. Either way, the willingness to stay changes the quality of the moment.

Unexamined aversion tends to generate drama. The mind, avoiding stillness, manufactures movement — endless narratives, self-critique, external blame. I sometimes think of this as the “noise of protection.” Beneath the content, the function is the same: distraction from direct contact with feeling.

In my own life, this often appears as overthinking. If I’m avoiding grief, I become analytical. If I’m avoiding fear, I become productive. The activity disguises itself as virtue — busyness, preparation, clarity — but underneath is the same motive: anything but this.

This dynamic is at the heart of the next workshop I’ll be leading — Stopping the Drama Cycle: A Workshop on Love & Our Limiting Patterns (3 November, 7.00–8.30pm UK time). We’ll be exploring how the mind uses drama — both internal and relational — to regulate discomfort. It’s not about pathologising the habit, but learning to see it clearly, tenderly, and to notice the quiet peace that emerges when we stop feeding it.

The paradox is that aversion softens not through conquest, but through companionship. The moment we stop trying to get rid of it, it begins to loosen its grip.

One practice that helps is gentle inquiry:

Ask, what am I unwilling to feel right now?
Ask, what am I protecting myself from?
And then, what would it feel like to allow just one degree more of openness?

This incremental approach — widening the window of tolerance rather than forcing it — honours the nervous system’s intelligence. As Bessel van der Kolk reminds us in The Body Keeps the Score, safety is the foundation of transformation.

Psychologically speaking, aversion is a sign that the psyche is reorganising itself. Spiritually speaking, it’s the ego’s last resistance before surrender. Either way, tenderness is the most effective solvent.

So much of contemporary self-help is built on the rhetoric of mastery: “hacking”, “rewiring” the brain. But perhaps what’s needed is not mastery but maturity: the willingness to work with the mind, not onit. Lately, I’ve been experimenting with what I call “soft discipline.” Instead of pushing through aversion, I create conditions for the opposite of fear: trust. I light a candle, clear my desk, breathe slowly, and remind myself that resistance is just another form of aliveness. It’s the psyche’s way of stretching before the leap.

In contemplative traditions from Buddhism to A Course in Miracles, resistance is reinterpreted as an invitation — an opportunity to practice forgiveness, not in the moral sense but in the cognitive one: the gentle release of judgement against ourselves for finding the work difficult.

This theme continues in Practical Miracles: Practicing the Course Beyond the Book (8 November, 2.00–5.00pm UK time) — a longer session on translating spiritual study into lived practice. We’ll explore how resistance can become revelation when approached through the lens of practice, not theory.

The longer I’ve worked with clients and students — and with my own mind — the more I see that aversion is not an obstacle to healing but one of its instruments. It appears wherever the psyche is trying to protect what it loves. To work with aversion, then, is to enter a relationship with love in its most disguised form.

The next time your mind pushes back, you might imagine thanking it. “Thank you for trying to protect me.” This simple act of recognition can dissolve years of struggle. Aversion doesn’t vanish, but it begins to trust you enough to soften. Growth, after all, isn’t the elimination of resistance but the deepening of relationship with it. What begins as pushback may, in time, become partnership — the psyche’s way of saying, I trust you to take me further than I could go alone.

Upcoming Workshops

Stopping the Drama Cycle: A Workshop on Love & Our Limiting Patterns
🗓 3 November, 7.00–8.30pm (UK time)
In this workshop we will explore how resistance and reactivity keep us circling the same emotional loops, and learn how to step out of them with compassion and clarity.

Practical Miracles: Practicing the Course Beyond the Book
🗓 8 November, 2.00–5.00pm (UK time)
This half-day workshop is deeper immersion into A Course in Miracles as a lived practice, where we will translate insight into relationship, creativity, and peace.